Well, mom's port is in place and healing nicely. Her whining is at a minimum. :) Seriously, if I had two surgeries in that short of a time span I would whine. She says she's not anxious about chemo starting Tuesday but all of her questions indicate otherwise. I would probably be anxious too.

My mom is a tiny woman. Short and thin. So short in fact that she fits under my arm. At my height and weight, I make that woman look like a dwarf. She's older. 71 years old to be exact. Sometimes I forget how small she is. Sometimes I forget how old she is. Tuesday on that hospital gurney after port placement, the stark reality of both was right there in my face. I just looked at her all hopped up on anesthesia, curled up in a little ball and well she just looked awfully fragile. I want to protect her from all of this. I need to protect her from all of this.

But... I can't go there. I can't let her see that. She feeds off of those closest to her. If we're positive, she's positive. If we're negative, she's negative. So, I'm as compassionate as I can be without giving her any indication that I see frailty or weakness. That would simply never do. I will be the one who has to push her. If / when she reaches the "I can't do this" stage, I will remind her that yes indeed she can.

I pray that these treatments are easy. I pray there is no sickness and limited weakness. But I really wish I could just do it all for her because I'm at a place of being physically stronger and frankly it just sucks that she has to go through this.

However, this cancer is treatable. She can get well. How many other people heard different news the day we heard Stage II. How many other people heard, there's nothing more we can do. How many other people went to their final resting place that day? So... we will be content with where we are. And we will be thankful in all circumstances. And we will thank God for picking us up and carrying us down this road we must now travel. And we will thank Him for His strength in these circumstances.